Lament

Maybe no one can hear the notes.
My songs never carry the same melody.
It seems easy to make something up without trying.
But when I try to play something with intention.

All inspiration is lost.
I have to resort to free humming and playing songs in my mind and in the air on my hands.


Shame.


Grammar does not help improve English. Just ask any decent English teacher.
If they don't know, they're not decent.


Back to singing a blend of life.

Uneasy Tranquility

Soon the ripples will form and spread.

Nothing is stable.
And I guess that's the way we humans like it.
Gives our puny lives a greater cause.

Wonders why I'm triple posting.

Seems that I'm having torrents of meaningless thoughts running through my head.
And I'm writing all this out of being unable to make sense of any of it.

Seems that I need doses of bittersweet things again.

I have grown ignorant of some things after realizing others.

Shame grows as I realize more of my imperfections.

But why does pride grow when I have nothing to be proud of?

Needs an editor.
I can't stand having to explain my posts because of ambiguity.

Double posting for the worst time ever I think.

Funny life. Had another one of those moments where you float out of your body and you wonder what the hell you really are on Friday.

Not the best of times.

Just thought of this.
Raising sensitive issues is one thing, what about overreacting to them?

SH made me realize some points about my style of writing.

I make myself sound way cocky.
True enough, I realized its truth after several re-readings.

Do forget this.

Afterall I'm still a nobody.

Barely, but still...

" Why practise so hard? You'll never beat the giants. You're never gonna be one. "
- Some ex-band teacher

How is it that a "servant of God" is telling others that something is impossible? How ironic. Oh you may or may not know who she is but if you do, you GET my point...

Hold your piss, how can a band teacher demotivate his/her own band?

With allies like this, who needs adversaries?


And the few envious seafield bandies, don't envy me. It took me 16 years to learn the flute in 2 days and other stuff. And I wasn't given more than any of you, I pay for my talents by sucking in other aspects.

Maybe you feel the same.

Dare To Fail

I had a go at actual conducting by request of Lavy on Saturday.I guess I didn't do too well. Although I did actually manage to pinpoint and correct some minor (and possibly major) faults/errors/mistakes/flaws or whatever you want to call them. Yea, more egoistic words might just spill.

Sher Hann had a rather amusing idea of writing a true account what you did in band, for band or to band, in letter form and sealing anything along with it in an envelope. But to what point and purpose if no one reads it though?Anyone care to explain? I'm kinda slow these days.

Some may or may not have noticed that I've been rather insensitive or quick to diss the past few practices. Assuming it's safe to assume that some band members actually read this tiresome, egoistic, lonely blog of mine, I offer my apologies to anyone who I may or may not have wronged and may or may not know it.Oh, wordplay.

Wee Ren introduced to me this insteresting piece "Flight of Valor" which Lick Hung's band played for the IOI mall contest back in his Lick Hung days. Have to get the song somehow.... Very insteresting stuff.Mundaneness comes to the minds of many a band member when one speaks of practicing Singapore Rhapsody. Yea, SSB has been playing this song for too long.
And guess who wants to show off some more quotes of his...

"What is passion without effort, or effort without passion?"

"He who studies for good results will learn nothing from studying; He Who studies for knowledge, will learn all."

I guess I've decided, a Trombone and a Tenor Sax. Maybe an Alto in future.


"I'm not going because I want to die, I'm going because I want to find out if I truly lived."
- Spike, Cowboy Bebop

When you have truly lived, you die with no regrets.